changelog

hello world

so as of today i guess this website is done on a fundemental level!!! yay!! i'll probably keep adding things or pissing about with it but it's cool that it exists. i've never made a website before but i think it's turned out pretty cool. i had a bit too much fun making the buttons on the links page to the point where i have been getting distracted from actually making the music.

in terms of the site, i've split it up into the home page (that i don't think i'll change any time soon), the demos page (which is where i'm gonna add music i'm working on), the ★ page (which is like just random life stuff and iwant to expand this and make it a bit more personal but idk what to do yet) and the links page where i've got links to my music, socials and cool sites online. i didn't include this one but i think it's great.

now i need to go make some more music

better button and record.club rss

i was feeling really cruddy late last night and ended up making a better button, so if you’re feeling down, feel free to give it a press.

since adding the letterboxd feed i was trying to get my record.club diary logs in the same place. i shot them an email because i couldn't see an rss feed specfically for the diary entries and it turns out they accidentally missed it when they shipped the rss feature so they updated it which is cool. shout out to mattias for getting back to me and deploying the activity feed/rss update. so that's been added to the ★ page!! i also overhauled the css so it doesn't break every single time i add something yay!!

homogenous or monotonous

yesterday i was reeling worrying that the songs i'm working on sound too samey. the last thing i'd want to do is making something boring. boring is the ultimate insult. it could be tired, it could be unimaginative, it could even but straight up bad… but if it's boring….....

but i had a thought about it. i've got a sort of 'bed' of how the songs sounds now, so as a listener, there's expectations of what might happen as each one unfolds, which means expectations can be subverted, which has opened up a whole load of possibilities. i'm excited to make more music today with this in mind.

scooters arcade and media preservation emporium

so i loooove physical media, i love holding a tangible piece of art !!! and as a way to practice my web design skills (and to use all this Scooter's branding i made for my arcade themed birthday last year), i put together a whole library of all my physical media, all in one place. if you want to check it out, you can see it here.

doing this, i learned a lot about web design but also i was really feeling that dunning-kruger effect creep in as i just bruteforced my way through most problems that came up... so honestly it could just totally break at some point.

even though this has been an entire week of my life i have been making music too. i've wrote and produced three tracks, but haven't recorded the vocals yet so that's why they're not here yet but they will be... i mean i haven't even shared this page around yet, i am enjoying having this place to myself... it's been nice.

scottisokay.com

i bought the domain scottisokay.com yay!! i was hoping .okay was a domain so i could get scottis.okay... but alas.

now it's official... i'm gonna post about this site on evil instagram next week! so if you're reading this: HELLO and welcome to my website!! leave a comment on the comments page and let me know you dropped by (you don't have to sign up or anything!!!) i'm gonna be updating the site with demos and life updates frequently!!! don't forget you can add this site to your phone like an app!!!

nervous (pun INTENDED)

soooo i didn't post my website on evil instagram over the weekend... i was meant to... but i got kind of nervous... i made like a whole promo video but i was cringed out by it because it felt sort of 'content-y' and i don't want to make 'content-y' stuff but that's sort of how it came out... i'm aware i'm using a lot of elipses (even more than usual) because i'm not really sure how to put into words. i think it's because i'm scared about the songs, before i planned on sharing them i thought they sounded so good in my head... and then the second i go to share them, it's like i hear them with new ears, like, 'this is out of tune' or 'this is so muddy' or whatever. i don't know how much of that is intuition or how much of it is just general anxiety. well... if you're reading this in april 2025, i did post it and you can hear them if you want. i think i am going to post it.

i can't spend the rest of my life worrying about what people think (easier in theory than it is in practice i suppose).

deadening

well... it's been a month since i was gonna launch the site and i didn't. i've been hit with some mental health shit booooo and haven't been very steady recently, lots of ups and lots of downs but no real news. tried getting back in the saddle this week with some writing but i'm drawing blanks, which sucks because i was on such a streak last month, feeling really inspired. but now i'm feeling a bit stuck... life-wise, music-wise, everything-wise. i wish i didn't feel like this but it's where i'm at. i'm gonna try and push through it though. i think next time i write something is when i'm gonna post the site maybe... idk.... i'm not really sure of anything at the moment.

remembering what i hate about making music in the modern day

so i released a song today with my friend. i'm so proud of this song, i think it's one of the best sounding things i've ever produced, i know if i heard it in the wild without context, i'd be tweaking out. i've spent the majority of my day trying a meriad of ways to promote it... it's been a while since i've released anything and i'm out of practice to say the least. and damn... like, all year i've not really spent any time on instagram and tiktok and today i did because i was trying to make some 'content' around the release and damn... like... just damn... idk what else to say... i hate being online doing and consuming short form stuff

posting the content is soul crushing... it just feels so pointless... and idk what else to do... sent out a bunch of emails and submitted the track to to x & y but nothing yet, the needle has not been moved. it's crazy how much easier it was to promote yourself a decade ago, everything was so much slower, there was more room to digest what you saw. i posted on my story for the first time this year today to share it... and like... all these people i used to be close with, people who shared with me a mutual support, either just didn't see it... or it got lost... or they've moved on. any of the above is totally cool, like i made my bed by subtracting myself from the scene online, but it does still sting a little i guess. i think i'm just sad about it because i really believe in this song and my brain is probably fried from reintroducing short form video content into my life again

don't really care if the music is huge or going viral or whatever... but i genuinly think if you put the song in front of the right audience, they'd eat that shit uppppppppppp!!! anyway... kind of a rant more than anything... that's not really the energy i wanted to bring to the blog but i didn't have anywhere else to put my thoughts...

''test album yay''

so we're totally ignoring my previous post because i decided i don't care!! I DON'T CARE!!! it's so freeing! i have got a beta version of my album!! I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!!! my music doesn't have to be perfect. it doesn't have to be 'good enough' to sit next to other music... i just have to like it (wow groundbreaking)!!! it came out so slow and then all at once!!! the album makes me sad because it's about sad things but i got giddy listening to it earlier bc it felt like a tapped into something i was trying to tap into since my first ever album with this project (which never came out but alas)... like... we're so back... we're so so back

also after having to post a bunch of marketing shit for the last release i got sucked back into zuck's disgusting little tiny arms but i have since shunned it from my life again... my phone is dead most of the day i do not care anymore i am freeeeeeeeeee!!! i love not knowing what's going on!!! also thank you to those scroll deep videos for letting me keep in the know... at arms reach!!!!!

anyway, literaly just putting all that here for prosterity. i will probably not show anyone the album until it's at the 95% mark. my reasoning behind this is actually something i was chatting about with some friends on new years eve, how there's a weird thing where once you announce something or show someone something, that's like the dopamine rush you were looking for and then you are more content with not finishing it... well... i am content on finishing it. i will post one or two of the demos here though :)